Over the weekend I compiled my “relaxing” playlist to bring with when I go into labor; this week I hope to create the much more aggressive “let’s do this” playlist. To make the most of the relaxation music I am supposed to listen to it before the big day while relaxing, so my brain and memory connect these songs with being at ease. I’ll give anything a shot to help cope with the pain of childbirth, so while I’m writing this incredibly stressful post I have my pretty little playlist going.
Thursday was a big day in the Solmonson house. We were scheduled to have our first biophysical profile ultrasound done – this is one of the big tests where if the baby or I fail, we could be sent over to the hospital for admittance or delivery – and, assuming it all went okay, we were heading out to a small but much needed gathering to celebrate Dustin’s 29th birthday.
Dustin was going to leave work a bit early so he could accompany me to this first appointment. I was working at my computer when the garage door swung open and in comes a breathless, shaky Dustin. “Someone ran my car off the road, I’m in the ditch!” he shouted at no one in particular, still in that dazed state that comes after a car accident.
I came over to him and looked out of our front door – sure enough, his car is blocking most of our driveway, which backs up to a very busy street.
The day before we had our first big snowfall of the season, about 7 inches in our neck of the woods. The temperatures dropped in a drastic attempt to rival the North Pole so the sand and salt hadn’t had a chance to melt anything. The guy behind Dustin was following too closely, and when Dustin put on right signal, the guy started to pass him ON THE RIGHT SHOULDER. Then he changed his mind, but was still going too fast, so Dustin had to pick between getting rear ended or to swerve off the road.
The best part? The guy pulled up next to Dustin, made eye contact, assumed he was uninjured…and then sped off.
Fear not, douchebag. Your karma will catch up with you soon enough.
Needing to get to our appointment, we try to get my car around Dustin’s, only to get stuck in the pile of snow at the end of the driveway. Lots of shoveling and pushing later, we made it to the clinic only a couple of minutes late.
The baby passed the BPP with a score of 8/8. Other than being in a breech position and being a tad on the small side, he seemed to be doing just dandy. I was not so fortunate. Not only was my blood pressure 158/98 but I spent most of last week feeling like I could throw up at any given moment. I had a constant headache and weird pain on the right upper side of my abdomen.
It shouldn’t have surprised me that the doc sent me to the hospital, but it did. We cancelled the much needed party on the drive over to triage. We were there a couple of hours while they drew my blood, took blood pressures and watched the baby on the non-stress test. My lab results are what saved me from a few steroid shots and a potential early induction.
Happy birthday Dustin!
Today I had 2 more appointments – first an ultrasound of my upper right insides (results were normal) followed by an afternoon follow up to read the results and check in after the hospital visit on Thursday. In a nutshell, we could truly have this baby at any point. If things stay as they are – miserable for me, safe for him – we’ll hang on until 36 or 37 weeks, then likely be induced if his lungs are matured.
Until then, I now have to go in twice a week for the BPP tests. Twice! I need a nap.
The little parasite’s heartbeat doesn’t show up unless I am holding the Doppler down. Awkward.
Though it was sort of amusing to listen to his hiccups for twenty minutes.
Yes, play on relaxing playlist. Calm me down, ease the anxiety, release the stress, prepare me for labor and delivery. Just…take care of me! I’m so preoccupied monitoring my body and waiting for each appointment to be the one where either something finally goes really wrong or we’re told it’s time to become parents to a preemie that I think whatever skills I had for relaxation have abandoned ship.
And writing? What writing? I think that if I tried to work on any of the projects I have in the mental works for 2014 they would be so far beyond a productive shitty first draft that it isn’t worth the effort. I’m not quitting, I swear, and I appreciate those who have stuck with this blog and its detours, and especially grateful to those who have recently purchased either of my books. Never have sales numbers made such a positive impact on my day!
Has anyone else been in the position of feeling completely mentally exhausted? What would go on your ultimate relaxation playlist?